The Hug & A Slap

You are no different than Navjot Sidhu, my 30 IQ younger brother Montu-the Moron (MTM) announced, as he served me black tea without sugar and a bowl of Gulabjamuns. Not even looking at him, partially hurt and half-heartedly I asked him for the reason of comparing me with Sidhu.

MTM – You are engaged in two diametrically opposite acts of having tea without sugar and eating bowl full of gulabjamuns, just like Sidhu, who is hugging an enemy supposedly engaged in masterminding 2020 referendum, exporting terrorism to our country and killing our jawans every other day and at the same time claiming he cares about country.

Hit hard, I dropped the last gulabjamun back in bowl and pushed cup of black tea into his hands.

Me – What do you think about Sidhus act of going to Pakistan and hugging the Pak army chief.

MTM – Think? Is there any need to think over it? He is free to hug any one he feels like. Mika too hugged Rakhi Sawant and almost swallowed her lips, you hand no opinion then.

Me – Rakhi Sawant and Mika were private citizens, Sidhu is not. He represents people.

MTM – That does not mean he surrenders his rights. Free will is his right. You and likes of you have merrily indulged in Sidhu bashing on every account, from who sat next to him to how Imran ignored him when he presented Imran with a shawl.

Me – There is something called probity, rights come next to it. Probity demanded, he conducted his self with extreme caution. At such ceremonies nothing happens by chance, everything is preplanned. He should have used maturity and political acumen to avoid embarrassing moments like sitting next to Masood Khan.

MTM – And the hug? Sidhu has already said it was an emotional reaction to an overwhelming news.

ME – If you can’t control your emotions and get overwhelmed at every news, you probably should denounce public life. How could he have forgotten the sons of soil who got killed by Pak army? I even doubt he represents people.

MTM – So like most, you feel that he is a traitor.

Me – Not representing people and being a traitor are two different things. For sure, it was grave insult to the sacrifices made by our soldiers. No nationalist should do it.

MTM – why so much of noise on Imran ignoring Sidhu? Sidhu claims he spent 40 minutes speaking to Imran on peace and other issues.

Me – It’s only what he claims. Did he speak about peace in backdrop of referendum 2020 or when Pak army was violating cease fire and pushing militants into our country? Its not for any random leader or citizen to broker peace with neighbour. There are processes and procedures for that. I believe Imran had already slapped Sidhu when he ignored Sidhu publicly and Sidhu returned the favour with a hug.

MTM – It’s only your biased presumption.

MTM walked out of discussion thumping his feet to convey his displeasure.

Me (raising my voice)– Keep in mind you moron, consistence without reason is virtue of fools.

MTM – I am already one just be cautious about yourself.

Me – Let me tell you, we are country of people with big hearts and intelligent brains, not all are born morons.

Tit For Tat, Hit The Hat & Ugly-The- Fugly

Ugly-The-Fugly (UTF), 30 IQ younger brother of mine, he was given an apt name, he masters the art of asking the ugly and fugly difficult questions. Solving extremely hard Sudoku tires me less, than having a daily ‘after office tea’ with UTF. Yesterday too UTF ripped my brains apart, here is what transpired between me and UTF.

Me :- This time our govt. has given free hand to armed forces to give bloody nose to Pakistan. Forces have crossed the LOC and killed many terrorists. LOC firing too has inflicted heavy causalities on the Pakistanis.

UTF :- Whats the proof?… means…. do you really believe it?

Me :- what do you mean “do you really believe it?”

UTF:- I meant why did we not do it all the past years, we had 26/11, we could have flown our fighter planes to raze terror camps in Pakistan that time.

Me:- Hummm.

UTF:- I truly mean it, come on, I mean, why those who didn’t act after 26/11 question our courage now, when we have acted.

Me:- Disbelief UTF, they can’t believe we have that much of courage.

UTF:- Courage? Our forces were always courageous, courage was never a missing link.

Me:- Political courage UTF.

UTF:- Why are they selective, will they question everything which they are not sure of…… I am taking of genetic lineage for themselves.

Me:- I can’t answer on their behalf UTF, but I can say you doubt only such things which you are not capable of doing.

UTF:- (unable to comprehend changes the topic) SIMI guys?

Me:- Stop it UTF, I am done with my tea.

UTF:- But police should not have killed those guys.

Me:- Ok, thanks for advice.

UTF:- I mean while people in general are happy, yet politicians are correct in asking questions. Its absolutely fine to feed biryani to terrorists. Will they question the Armed forces killing terrorist in Kashmir?

Me:- Democratic process UTF. Now I am leaving.

UTF:- You may, while I ponder upon the suicide of a retired army man at India Gate. By the way, army man committing a suicide is strange, isn’t it? You told me only feeble hearted commit suicide.

Me:- keep pondering, that’s better.

UTF:- Army men are disciplined and bighearted brave men, how could he commit a suicide?

ME:- For OROP.

UTF:-How can one who agrees to die for nation without asking a question kill himself for issue like OROP. I don’t have sympathies for him.

Me:- Neither do I have, but am sad it happened.

UTF:- (shuffling in sofa) I think even politicians don’t have sympathies, I saw those guys smiling on TV, presumably while showing solidarity for him. They aren’t sad either.

Me:- Ugly I am done with you, play with your toys, the battery operated car I got for you yesterday. (I bang the door behind me).

UTF:- Last thought…………….. ok my car. (Raising his voice) But how can a person committing a suicide be a martyr? Committing a suicide is bad in law, how can we give him 1 cr compensation?…… battery of my car is drained… help me put it to charging.

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